Let's Heal Our Lives.

Wow. You guys. Today I started a new part of my healing journey. I believe that we have a lot of power and that we really can help to heal our own lives. I believe in western medicine and I know there are so many amazing things it has to offer, but I have always felt like there has to be MORE. There has to be more than just medications to help people function.
Last year when this all began I hated the thought that I had to wait 2 months to see if the medicine helped. That that was the biggest focus was just changing my meds. I didn't want to just sit around and wait. And I hated thinking that the medication was the key.  I wanted to actively be DOING something to help MYSELF. THERE HAD TO BE MORE. And thats when I encountered a post about self care on Pinterest and it changed the game for me. I became intrigued with that because I NEEDED to feel taken care of. I needed to feel like I could personally contribute to my healing because it was MY body and MY mind. Medication is amazing, and i've been on it for years, but sometimes i have felt like it is just a bandaid, or a crutch and I don't want to be on it forever. It's not FIXING the problem or taking it away, it's just something to HELP. I wanted something MORE. And I found it.
 So one thing led to another and I dove into the world of self care, yoga, reflexology, energy healing, meditation, chakras, mantras, positive thinking, the law of attraction, healing my body from the inside all the way to the outside.
I started to learn and study and research and try soooo many new things! It was my new focus in my life because I had faith these things would help. And i felt very much guided towards them and I was willing to try anything. It was a little hippy dippy and hokey pokey at first, because it was unfamiliar. But I just went with it and I am so so so grateful I did.
 I watched as day by day it changed my life for the better. It didn't happen all at once, but gradually I began to see a HUGE difference that all of these things made in my anxious and troubled life. It began a journey of self love and self acceptance. Of healing from past events. Of forgiving others and forgiving myself. It led me closer to God, to feel the spirit in my life easier. It taught me about how every single pain and ailment in our life is caused because of SOMETHING in our minds- an experience, a thought, a problem, an event- THEY ARE ALL LINKED TOGETHER. I saw in my personal life how my anxiety, my perfectionism, my neck pain, my headaches-- they each were linked to something that had happened or an emotion that I was having or something I was going through.  I learned how past events shaped me. And learned things about myself I never would have realized otherwise. I DOVE DEEP YOU GUYS. Talk about soul searching and soul reawakening- this stuff is real. And I know it sounds hippie hippie but there is also science behind this and some of these beliefs have been around for years and years and years. Skeptical? Read the book You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay. It will change your life. It has changed mine and is a great way to start venturing and learning about this whole new way of life.
So, right now, I am at a point in my life where I am managing my anxiety and panic disorder FOR THE MOST PART. I still have my trials. I still have my mountains and things that are hard to mange. I still have limitations, but I am farther than where I was a year ago. And if these tools could help me when I was at my lowest of lows, i wonder what they will do for me when I am at my medium of mediums- haha not a thing but you know what I mean.
So I am diving back in and going to start focusing back on  my self care and morning/nightly routines. Today I took a few hours to do this, and I literally feel like my soul is happy and I know I am headed in the right direction for what my life needs at this time.
I am participating in an incredible 7 Day challenge to help heal my body from the inside out and I would love for you to join me. The amazing Sydney from The Daybook is hosting it in a Facebook group and you can start it whenever and go at your own pace and begin to learn more about yourself and healing.

xoxo
Bailey

What's In My Self Care Tool Kit?

Self Care has been a HUGE part of my Healing Journey. HUGE HUGE HUGE. A few months ago, before my anxiety came in and tried to take over my life, I was feeling kind of blah. This was my life almost everyday- I would wake up, go to work, come home and watch Netflix on my lunch break and decide what I was going to make for dinner, go back to work, come home and make dinner, maybe get in workout, spend time on snapchat, insta, Facebook, sometimes Pinterest, cuddle with my hubby and spend an hour to 2 watching Netflix, get ready for bed and go to bed. Does that sound familiar to anyone else? It was a routine, and life was good, but I just felt like I didn't have TIME. For anything. And I was just going through those motions. I had tons of things I WANTED to do - yoga, meditation, calligraphy, learn about makeup, clean, organize etc. But it just felt like I couldn't fit it in anywhere and that there wasn't a purpose for everything I wanted to do. Then I came across a few "Self Care" Pins on Pinterest and became so INSPIRED.

I loved the idea of MAKING time for myself!  I loved the idea of doing things I wanted to do just because I want to do them and they will make me happy! That I could take time out of my busy day to draw a hot bath, put bubbles or a bath bomb in, light some candles, plug in my himalayan salt lamp, watch grey anatomy on my laptop and just CHILL THE HECK OUT and just ENJOY myself without feeling guilty! That I could make time for ME and do some yoga and just focus on myself- mentally, physically, spiritually. Self Care opened up this whole new world and changed my perspective and how I live my life. It's not in any way just another thing to add to my "to-do" list, it is ME time to check in with my well being and get recharged/recentered.

Here is my Self Care Tool Kit. Take note that I don't always use all of these "tools" at the same time or even everyday! I use different ones at different times of the day and it also depends on my mood! But I definitely use at least 3-5 of these every single day! These are my little things that make a big difference everyday--

1. My Himalayan Salt Lamp
Himalayan Salt Lamps are said to increase energy levels, improve mood & concentration, purify the air, and decrease stress levels. I ALWAYS have this on when I am doing yoga, meditating, reading, bathing, or just trying to relax! It really helps me feel at peace and is soothing to me.

2. Aromatherapy
I love to use candles, my essential oil diffuser, and my favorite bath bombs or bath salts. My favorite candle right now is Bath and Body Works Mahogany Teakwood High Intensity candle. I always carry around an essential oil blend with me for when I'm feeling really stressed and need to recenter myself or focus on something else.

3. Self Help Books
I recently started You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay and it has seriously changed my life. I would recommend this book to everyone and anyone! It makes me feel so empowered and like I can accomplish anything that I want! It has different exercises to do throughout the book that have really been great at changing my perspective, making me a more positive and forgiving person, and helping me with my anxiety. This is the first self help book I have read and I'm so excited to read more after this one!

4. Journaling
I have my personal journal where I will write about anything and everything, I'm not as good at writing in it as I used to be when I was younger but it's nice when I feel like I just need to write my thoughts down or talk about what is going on in my life.  I also recently started -what I call- my "Healing Journal". I started my healing journal when I began counseling as a way to write down things I learned from therapy. I LOVED writing in it and decided to dedicate an entire journal to my Healing journey! I write down thoughts I have after meditation or yoga, quotes from Pinterest that apply to my healing journey, positive affirmations, and quotes from the self help book I am reading that I want to remember.

5. Yoga
Over the past month I have learned that yoga isn't just about "stretches" and being able to do awesome poses and headstands. It is actually a really spiritual and peaceful time for me. It's my time to connect and to heal - mind, body, and spirit.

6. Mindfulness Meditation
I can't say enough how much I love the Headspace app! If I am anxious when I wake up I try and do a 10 minute session to clear my head or I do it at lunch! It feels so good to take a break from thinking and to try to live in the moment. To just focus on here and now instead of all the unrealistic/future/anxious thoughts that I am so good at creating. I just get to clear my head and focus on how I am right then and there in that moment.

7.Pinterest
I love Pinterest so much because it is all about me! Sounds so selfish, but whatever, it's the truth. I love that it's my own vision board of everything I love! It helps me clear my head and fill it with all things lovely and me!

8. Organizing
I am queen of getting rid of things. I don't like extra clutter and sometimes I get so sick of saying "maybe i'll wear that/use that someday" because usually I don't. Sometimes I just take 1 drawer or a shelf or a section of  a room and just reorganize and throw things away! Other times I take time to organize my Pinterest boards, music playlists, or apps on my phone.


xoxo
Bailey

The Beginning of My Healing Journey

December 2 I was thrown into this whole knew realm of anxiety. It transformed to Panic Disorder and then to Agoraphobia. It was this whole new thing for me that I have never experienced and I could have never imagined that I would go through it. I'll spare you all the details and get to the good part. The part where I finally have hope back in my life. The part where I am yelling it out to the Universe that I CAN DO THIS. 

This is transformation time for me because I've chosen to make it that. I've chosen to FIGHT this and try everything that I possibly can to manage my anxiety and take back MY life. I was brought so low, SO SO low, lower than I could have ever imagined, so that I could CHANGE and TRANSFORM. Sounds super dramatic and/or cliche, right? But it's true. And it's taken me a while to get to this point but I'm on this journey right now to help myself heal (I just love that word so much).

Here is my healing journey so far-

A week and a half a go I chose certain things that I was going to work on and and ways I was going to change. I didn't want to just let anxiety run my world and I didn't want to just sit around and wish it away. I wanted to actively be doing things to help myself! And I was willing to do and try anything. Seriously. I was so so stuck you guys. Anyways these things have brought me hope over the past few weeks and are a big part of my healing journey.

+Research- I wanted to learn more about anxiety, panic disorders, and agoraphobia. I went to Dr Google and searched everything and anything about them. I feel like it helped me to understand why my body was doing this in order to help me to change it. I read tons of great articles that gave tons of great insights and advice on how to overcome it and things to try. Anxiety Coach and Calm Clinic were great and useful websites!

+Yoga- I've been wanting to get more into yoga these past few weeks so I figured now would be the perfect time. I started reading about Yoga and how it can help anxiety! The Yoga Journal has some awesome articles about yoga and anxiety together and separate. (Here's an awesome article that really was helpful to me!) I started doing yoga every day and using that time to just focus on me and healing. It was incredible how much peace and hope I found by doing this. I started learning more about yoga, chakras, mantras, intentions, balance and became hooked. I started by pinning a bunch of yoga tutorials, pictures, and flows from Pinterest so that I could learn and do more. Here is my Yoga board that helped me to get started.

+Meditation-I read and watched a lot of videos about meditation and all the benefits of it. I have used the app Headspace  many times and after doing the free trial 2x I saw how meditation really was beneficial for me. I loved how I could just take an absolute BREAK for 10 minutes and just be at peace and recenter myself and I wanted more so I purchased it and I'm SO happy that I did! It has taught me a lot about not reacting to my thoughts and how to separate my emotions from my thoughts.

+Counseling- I have gone to counseling 3 times in the past week and a half and I'm so grateful that I started it. It feels so good to be able to get feedback from someone who has tools that they can teach me to help myself cope and manage my anxiety. I have loved having an outlet where I can be 100% uncensored and honest that they truly care and do understand. It's not only helping me with my anxiety but other aspects of my life as well. The biggest thing I have learned so far is how I need to ACCEPT my anxiety. I think for my whole life I tried to FIGHT it, and accepting it just seems crazy to me because I DONT WANT IT. I DONT WANT IT TO BE APART OF ME. But my counselor has helped me to realize that I have it, and there's nothing I can do about that fact, so I need to accept it. It is changing my life. 

+ Self Care- I found a Pin about Self Care that lead me to this Blog. I LOVE this post and this blog!!  It sparked something inside of me and I am obsessed with the thought about self care! It kind of just fit in with everything I was trying to work on for the past few weeks! And just shows how IMPORTANT self care is! Even if it just 10-30 minutes a morning or evening. TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF and recenter and have peace and happiness! I'll be blogging a lot more about this later. But a big part of my self care is taking the time to journal again! I used to be an avid journal write growing up then I was not so good at it. Now I am getting to much peace from writing!

+Positivity- I watched the Documentary The Secret on Netflix. The graphics are super cheesy and I do not like how the Documentary is put together but I LOVE the message. It's all about the Law of Attraction and how you can have the life that you want by putting it out into the universe, making it known, and pretending like it's already yours. ANYWAYS, I would recommend it to everyone because of the message but maybe try and find the book because I liked that better! ANYWAYS- each morning, when I'm doing yoga, or if I catch my thoughts are super negative, and every night I have a few phrases that I say to myself to make me more positive. Anxiety has this way of wanting to scare you and trap you and tell you that you will always be that way and that you will always be stuck and that everything has a negative or scary ending. But turning my thoughts into positive ones has been SO powerful in my everyday life. Just saying a few simple positive phrases! 

"Many times when God isn't changing your circumstance it's because He's mostly concerned with changing YOU within your circumstance. Your character, your inner strength, your integrity matters to Him because they are everlasting qualities. The wisdom, the strength and the maturity that grows within you are all things you're going to need to sustain the calling God has on your life. Know that there is a purpose in your pain."

Keep Fighting everyone!!

xoxo

Bailey

Images via Pinterest